April 25, 2023 - Wanda Wonder #1

Now here is where things get interesting.

10 day post gap… That’s more like it. I was supposed to do a Real World but ended up just writing 500 words of nonsense. I also wanted to do a pottery class not-video-log thing but the class was obnoxiously expensive. But we have a good post today. If you read the original blog, you know where this is going. But shhh, keep it a secret. I want to do a dramatic storyline.

Wanda Wonder is an Apet who runs an interview/talk show with Mainlanders to give Apets a glimpse into life on the Mainland. This post will be a “transcript” of her interview with Benny. Of course, realistically, it doesn’t make sense for her to interview everyone in the Mainland - People aren’t very unique. But I said it’s happening, so it’s happening. Her show is called Wanda’s W5. It used to be called Who, What, When, Where, Why, with Wanda Wonder in the original blog, but a) I got tired of typing that many letters and b) Wanda’s W5 works with the WU (“three u”) term for what I call this univerze. 

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Wanda Wonder: Hello Apets and Mainlanders! Welcome back to W5! I'm your host, Wanda Wonder, and today I will be interviewing Benny Koi. How are you, Benny?

Benny Koi: I’m great! Thank you for having me!

WW: It’s my pleasure. So, for our first question, WHO are you?

BK: I’m Benny Koi. I am a Mainlander ceramicist. I have two pet koi, Moon and Tsuki.

WW: Ooh, pet koi! Could you tell us WHAT koi are?

BK: Koi are a type of fish. They come in many colors, but I am named after the alien word for the orange species, Benigoi. It is from the alien language Japanese. Tsuki means moon in Japanese as well.

*Words from Earth, particularly words from languages other than English because this story is written in English, are called alien words. People only know alien words if they have a reason to - Benny knows the word Benigoi because it’s her namesake. Other Mainlanders don’t know those words. They can’t be written in the WU language, only spoken. Apets often know more alien words or languages because they aren’t as restricted in their fields of education.*

WW: Very interesting, an alien namesake! You said you were a ceramicist - WHEN was your last commission?

*Success in the Mainland can theoretically be measured in the number of commissions you receive - if your Talent is “needed/popular” - but this is a very formal question and doesn’t matter as much as it seems like it could.*

BK: I am currently working on the torch pot that I make every Astro for the MSS Introduction.

*MSS = Mainland Sports Showcase - Because there is no competition and everyone has a unique and individual Talent, there aren’t sports games - instead there’s an annual showcase. The introduction (think Olympic Opening Ceremony) takes place in various areas around the Mainland and features Apets and Mainlanders doing performances like music or acrobatics..*

WW: Ahh, the torch pot. WHERE is the MSS Introduction this Astro?

BK: The Introduction is in 6604314, so I’m making a totem pole torch pot.

*Those numbers are how “zip codes” work. If you’re wondering what they mean, it’s the binary code of the word for the general category of people’s Themes in a neighborhood - those binary number digits are added up to create these fake zip code neighborhood names.*

WW: Amazing, amazing. Now, for the last question…

WW and Studio Audience: WHY are you wonderful?

BK: Ceramics can be used for so many things so I get lots of commissions.

WW: Hmm. *fake laugh* Well, that's all for tonight! Thanks for joining us on W5! Once again, I'm your host, Wanda Wonder. Stay tuned tomorrow for another exclusive interview. Thank you and goodnight!

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Wanda is a strange character. That last question, why are you so wonderful, is the focus point of her interview. She didn’t really get what she wanted today, though. Hmm.

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